Signs that make you Smile

Humor is always good for the body, and the soul.  Hope you enjoy these as much as I do....

SIGN IN LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE:

"Bargain Basement Upstairs"

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IN A PODIATRIST’S OFFICE:

“Time wounds all heels”

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ON A SEPTIC TANK TRUCK IN OREGON:

“Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels”

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(My personal favorite!)

ON A PROCTOLOGIST’S DOOR:

“To expedite your visit please back in”

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ON A PLUMBER’S TRUCK:

“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber”

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AT A TIRE SHOP IN MILWAUKEE:

“Invite us to your next blowout”

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AT A TOWING COMPANY:

“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows”

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IN A RESTROOM:

"Toilet out of order - please use floor below"

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IN A LAUNDROMAT:

"Automatic washing machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out"

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SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK:

"Elephants please stay in your car"

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Chocolate Eclair Cake (Make Ahead)

We've always called this a cake, though it's a simple, no-bake, delicious dessert.

Try it...you'll like it.

(I use sugar free pudding and 50% reduced-sugar frosting, and serve it to company.  No one knows unless I tell them - the only real difference is that using sugar free makes the pudding softer set...frosting doesn't set up as much either, but it's still delicious)

CHOCOLATE ECLAIR CAKE

3 cups cold milk
2 small pkgs. instant french vanilla pudding mix
1 - 8 ozs. frozen whipped topping, thawed
1 pkg. (14.4 ozs) graham crackers
1 - 16 ozs. can chocolate frosting

In a large bowl, whisk milk and pudding mixes for 2 minutes.  Let stand for 2 minutes or until soft-set.  Fold in whipped topping.  In a 9" X 13" X 2" dish, layer a third of the graham crackers and half of the pudding mixture.  Repeat layers.  Top with remaining graham crackers.  Refrigerate for atleast 1 hour.

Spoon frosting (I rarely use all of it) into a microwave-safe bowl.  Cover and microwave on high for 15 - 20 seconds or until softened, stirring once.  Spread over graham crackers.  Chill 12-24 hours before serving.

Yield: 15 - 18 servings

For a flavor change - use one pkg. of pistachio pudding, in place of one vanilla. This makes a lovely presentation!

God's Incredible Pharmacy

 This is such awesome info! God knows how much I'm a visual person, and need to have these kinds of 'visuals' to help me eat healthier...

It's been said that God first separated the salt water from the fresh, made dry land, planted a garden, made animals and fish... All before making a human. He made and provided what we'd need before we were born. These are best & more powerful when eaten raw. We're such slow learners...

God left us a great clue as to what foods help what part of our body!

God's Pharmacy! Amazing!

A sliced Carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye... And YES, science now shows carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.



A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart has four chambers and is red. All of the research shows tomatoes are loaded with lycopine and are indeed pure heart and blood food.



Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.



A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds on the nut are just like the neo-cortex. We now know walnuts help develop more than three (3) dozen neuron-transmitters for brain function.



 Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes, they look exactly like the human kidneys.





Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and many more look just like bones. These foods specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet, the body pulls it from the bones, thus making them weak. These foods replenish the skeletal needs of the body.

Avocadoes, Eggplant and Pears target the health and function of the womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats one avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight, and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? It takes exactly nine (9) months to grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).

Figs are full of seeds and hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the mobility of male sperm and increase the numbers of Sperm as well to overcome male sterility.

Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetics.



Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries.





Oranges, Grapefruits, and other Citrus fruits look just like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breasts and the movement of lymph in and out of the breasts.







Onions look like the body's cells. Today's research shows onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes. A working companion, Garlic, also helps eliminate waste materials and dangerous free radicals from the body.

Out of the Mouths of Babes

I've been encouraged to share these silly stories that have given us some great laughs. Grandkids certainly DO make life GRAND!

 During the benefit for Caden last weekend, he found a Trivial Pursuit game in the huge toy display.  He sat on the ground throwing his dice, with the cards scattered all around him.  As I walked by, I saw him throw the dice, and keep his hand open.  I laughed to myself that he seemed to know what he was doing. 

It wasn't long and his big sister Charlie came into the garage where many of us were, laughing herself silly.  She told us that she saw Caden shaking the dice in his hand, and then say...

"C'mon Baby - Mama needs (holds the hand with the dice to his mouth and 'huffs' on them a couple of times) a new pair of shoes!'

 Oh my goodness - we have cracked up over that time and time again.  He loves repetition and definitely has watched some things too much on the tv!

Deb & Greg's oldest, Claira, who is 4 also, comes up with the craziest things from a child her age.  Not long ago - she put on a bathing suit and was twirling and 'modeling' it in their home.  She looked over her back at her mom and said

"Look mom...I've got a big butt like yours". 

Kids are just too hilarious sometimes huh?  Had to share the chuckles with ya'll!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

My dear mother was born on this date in 1923.  She entered the Gates of her Heavenly Home when she was only 64.  We miss her dearly, but are very grateful for the influence and godly example she so freely shared with us while she walked among us.  She loved to sew - and she let me spend time in the kitchen while she was busy at her machine.  Thus, I credit her with my love of being in the kitchen. Thank you Mom! *-* I want to honor Mom today by sharing a couple of favorite recipes from her files.



TISH-DE-LISH

(One that my siblings still request at family gatherings)

3/4 cup sugar
1 T. butter, softened
1/2 cup milk
1 cup all purpose flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1-1/2 Tb. baking cocoa
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 tsp. baking powder

Mix by hand and pour into greased 9" X 9" square baking dish.
Sprinkle over top: 1/2 cup sugar and 1/2 cup chopped nuts
Mix 1/4 cup baking cocoa and 1/2 cup brown sugar together, then sprinkle over top.
Pour 1-1/4 cup boiling water over top and bake at 350 for 30-35 minutess or until center is set.
Serve upside down with whipped cream.

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The following cookie recipe is my favorite crunchy cookie. One of my fondest memories of mom is when she would spend a winter's day in the kitchen baking several varieties of cookies. When we'd get home from school - the kitchen windows would all be fogged up and the kitchen counters and table, would be covered with the 'fruits' of her labors. We'd get to choose one (maybe two) cookies for an after-school snack and the rest would go in the freezer to be used for our school lunches and unexpected company. She made mostly crunchy cookies because my dad always loved dunking cookies in his coffee.

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COWBOY COOKIES

2 cups all purpose flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. cinnamon, optional
1 cup shortening (margarine or Crisco)
2 eggs
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
1 tsp. vanilla extract
2 cups rolled oats
1 - 12 ozs. pkg. chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350.  Combine dry ingredients; beat shortening, eggs, and sugars until smooth.  Blend in dry ingredients - add vanilla and oats - then chocolate chips.  Drop by teaspoonsful on ungreased cookie sheet and bake 12 - 14 minutes.